The Composure Piece

It just happened again.  Right after I titled this piece.  I lost my composure.

As a mom, it happens all the time.  Well, I try to limit it to twice a week, but...

I am sorry, but if I have to tell you "no" more than once, or anything more than once for that matter, I get pissy.  Seriously pissy.  Perhaps I should have taken much more of a bad-ass-mom sorta stance when the boys were younger and more pliable.  It may be too late now.  Let us all, for the children's sake, hope not.

See, one night, not very long ago (cue dream sequence music here) this happened...

My two cherubs were pleasantly watching TV as I was on the computer in the family room.  Spouse was away (don't remember where), but away.  Yes, I was probably facebooking (is this an acknowledged verb yet?) but 'tis totally beside the point.  One sweet child spilled his peanuts all over the floor and proceeded to SIT THERE, waiting for the dog to devour them or for them to magically disappear.

  Me: "Pick up the peanuts, please."
  No response from spawns.
  Me: "Pick UP THE peanuts, please."
  No movement.  One says, "Wasn't me."
  Me: "PICK UP the PEANUTS, PLEASE!"  (insert various curse words anywhere in that statement)
  Again, for real, NOTHING!

Now, you know that scene in "Terms of Endearment" when Shirley MacLaine's character is in the hospital with Debra Winger and Shirley (Aurora) wants Debra (Emma) to have her pain shot.  It is a little past the time when she was due to receive the shot, and Aurora goes on and on about how she shouldn't have to wait, that it was past time, and then she goes all medieval on the nurses' asses, and shouts, "GIVE MY DAUGHTER THE SHOT!"

That was me...about friggin' peanuts.  Not kidding.  In. Any. Way.

"PICK UP THE PEANUTS, PICK UP THE PEANUTS, PICK UP THE PEANUTS, PICK UP THE PEANUTS!"  Literally I was jumping up and down, pounding on my legs.  Swear.

Now I do not like to lose my composure like this, but it was absolutely necessary. 
The upside of this loss of control is that now when I say calmly to my two beautiful children, "Pick up the peanuts", it clearly means that mommy is about to lose it in a big and ugly way, no matter what.  It has brought results.

Here is my justification on that peanut behavior...It may be better to have my boys THINK I am legitimately crazy and have them be afraid of me when I get that crazed look in my eyes, than for me to actually GO crazy trying to supress it and maintain my composure.

Will the boys need therapy?   No doubt.  If they invite me to partake in any way, I will. And I will try to maintain my composure on the couch.